Amarillo Tower

Hailing Amarillo Tower, this is Major Eight-Fifteen
I’m about to cross your airspace and you know what that could mean.
I got cleared from Montezuma, but I haven’t landed yet
Please tell your planes to make a hole – I can’t quite steer this jet!

8:15, we have you, you are headed for the drink,
but your altitude is steady, which should give you time to think.
Our local “drink” is also called the Gulf of Mexico,
and if you’re low on fuel we have at least one Texaco.

Amarillo Tower, you are really quite a gas
If I could stop for petrol then I wouldn’t need this pass
But I can no more stop this car than I can explain
Why this Malibu is flying through the air just like a plane!

8:15, your luck has held, and it’s phenomenal
your altitude and vector path are cleared and nominal
We have half the town outside to watch you go on by
It isn’t every day we see a car up in the sky!

Amarillo, thanks for that, I’m glad to be a show
but I think that I’d be gladder still to land this thing, you know?
A hundred miles back I had a run in with a goose;
Now the windshield wiper’s busted, and the seatbelt won’t come loose.

Major Eight-Fifteen, it’s a shame about the bird,
Those air strikes can be messy, or at least that’s what I’ve heard;
but no worries on the seatbelt, ’cause I think it’s for the best
Local laws demand that they stay tight across your chest.

I hear you Amarillo, and if I ever get her down
I’ll make sure I wear my seatbelt while I’m driving through your town
but right now I must confess I’d rather talk about my route
I’m a damn sight more concerned with getting DOWN than getting out!

8:15, we read you, and your vector’s changing now
Since we know you can’t be steering, we’re really not sure how
But your route now has you headed South toward Abilene
By the time you get to Austin, you might manage to de-plane!

Thank you Amarillo, it’s been fun and it’s been real
I guess I’m stuck a while longer in this flying piece of steel
When I get down I’ll look you up, assuming I get down
And if I do, I swear that I will never leave the ground!

(Next stop:  Christmas!)